1ST APRIL : April Fool's Day

Imagine me! I was going to forget that 1st of April is the world's fool day, kudos to my countries(Nigeria) Election, the tension is in the air,I love my country I cannot help but say it. God bless Nigeria. :) . Really, I cannot comprehend what April fools day means that but then its a celebration, I wonder who would have thought of that.

Anyways as a medium of marking one of the celebrations and cooling off from the Decision of Nigeria, I will like us to do something different. Kindly drop a comment stating the best prank that has been played on you and by you and ideas of wonderful pranks for the day.

The Third to comment gets a recharge card. All you need do is to comment with your email address and the idea which you think is best and if you think of any prank that you did not find funny, let us know.

How I Overcame Mood Swings

I tend to wear my emotions on my sleeve. I've had my share of mood swings, believe me. But it's a powerful thing when you realize that you have dominion over your behavior and your passions.-Matt Dillon

Haha, Just as I was about starting this topic I almost fell a victim of a mood swing , back in the days I would have but now, no moooreee. This early morrring for that matter oo!  Ah! May God not bring people that will make us unhappy our way in the morning. Help me say Amin.

Ehen! My Ulovers as Korede Bello said its bellovers,as my name is Uju so its Ulovers nah? abi?. Yeah am quite excited today am going to be talking about me. This topic is totally about me and how I got happiness as a lifestyle rather than a happy and sad me, I chose one. *winks* u can do that too.

Mood swing is a terrible, terrible character if I must put it that way, it was a terrible character I had. To those who know me personally, you guys know the story. I could smile this minute and frown the next minute. And then it almost felt like it was a normal way of life till it started making worse things happen to me, I lost friends, I was always lost in thoughts, above all I became very aggressive. Mood swings come with anger.

But then I decided and told myself that this just had to stop.  It was not easy trust me, but then I will be sharing what I discovered were the causes and how I overcame. I actually took my time to sort it out and I discovered the very common causes of my Mood Swings. 

I will be listing a few causes:

Accumulated Anger: Not letting out your anger, swallowing it and then it builds off and show cases in its worse ways.

Associating with the wrong company of friends: Do not get me wrong, to me they were wrong in the sense that, what could make them smile could make me sad and thereby affecting my day and I dislike negativity.

Murmuring and complaints: Instead of using my sense of humor properly I could complain for Africa but thank God for God. *In my Bestest voice* lol.

How I Overcame:

- Prayer: There is no greater solution to a challenge than that which we drop at the table of God. This was my first step to complete victory. 

-For Accumulated Anger: I learnt to speak out and thank God for restoring my Sense of Humor, so I knew how to accept an expensive joke. 

Choosing the right group of friends: I discovered the best in my friends,met the positive ones, met the Spiritually grounded ones, met the Bestest, stayed glued to the Sisi, met the playful ones, happy and energetic ones. You guys are a blessing to me I must say. I cannot mention names but you all know yourselves *hugs*

-Activating my hobby: Rather than get out of a mood, I rather start doing what I love to do best, maybe listen to music, watch a comedy skit, if possible change of environment is necessary and so on.

I must say am a lot happier, cheerful, playful, name it and above all I feel like me *yikess*

Am sure many of us go through same mood swing challenges, you too can get off it. I am always happy now, people say its impossible but then I say it is possible. Life is too short to be anything but happy. You have to make conscious efforts and pray about it.  

This is my experience and I found a solution, I conquered. You too can.

I will sincerely appreciate your comments, if you have an experience to share about anything kindly send it to chukwuuju@ymail.com. 

Believe In Yourself

My people how una dey? Hope the weather is not getting at you. Ah this kind election post I want to drop, in this picture above I am making an important call to INEC officials. Na play oooo.

However unto what I want to share today, the inspiration actually came from this my pisure :). And it is BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. I had started working on this topic ever since and I crowned it up with one of the T.D Jake's preaching I heard on Sunday on my way from Church, Kudos to Inspiration Fm, you guys are too much.

To believe in yourself means to see the impossibilities of now like though they were already completed. You are not there yet does not mean you will not get there, c'mon ignore all of those who speak less of you and those negative thoughts and please hear the voice inside you, infact look at the picture and understand am making a call to you and telling you that yes you can make it, do not bother how I got your number 😊. A time might come in one's life you see your fellow ladies/guys doing stuff and you wonder how are they dong it and you try to do all you can just to be like them, understand that as far as you have God and you are work hard, what takes others 5 years can take you 1 year, just be persistent and BELIEVE. Do you know that someone is somewhere wanting to be like you. We should only get bothered if the way we live is not one that someone somewhere wants to be like us. The strength of believing in yourself gives room to build your faith.

People often say I do not believe I can make it, who told you, did the person create you. Was the person there when you were being selected by a God. Who told you there can never be a solution, who told you its too late. Oh C'mon. The story of Abraham, he was called Abram meaning exalted father but then he never had a child, God made it beautiful by calling him Abraham meaning father of Nations but then he still did not have a child until after 25years but he still believed in God and in who he was destined to be and lived life with all joy, do you think people would not have mocked him, but then he knew that what his future had was way better than what anyone said.

You  are still figuring how to do things right and God is saying I have more in store for you. All it takes is to Believe! Beleieve and Believe. You have been weak, scared and intimidated but there is another you, inside of you. Think the best of yourself, do not sit in your boat of worries and sink, sit up think positive and step into possibilities.

Do not let anyone deceive you and make you feel less than your worth. If you were not needed you would not have been born. God did not bring you into this world to leave you.

Keep speaking, keep believing, keep acting. Be ready to shut negative words out by your positive words.

Believe in yourself. No one can be you and no one is better than you. You were born for a reason.

Thank you for ready. Kindly drop your comments and if you have stories to share or you want us to answer questions. Feel free to reach out to me via mail  chukwuuju@ymail.com

LOVE 101: PART 2E: The Power Of Communication

Photo credit http://1.bp.blogspot.com

Had to quickly put this together, sorry for delay in posts due to my nature of work. We are going to be discussing about one of the most important topics and that will be this will be the last in our 101 series and please feel free to drop ideas of topics you want to be attended to.

Communication, it is often said that with communication as individuals especially in a relationship we are just two normal people. The power of communication saves us the stress of having to assume. At the commencement of a relationship in most cases the guy says will you be my girlfriend, I do not know if it still happens that way or if this is old school, but in the absence of that question we have two young people who are just in their world assuming, 'I THINK WE ARE IN A RELATIONSHIP'. But then the power of having to ask and communicate the status of friendship saves you from the assumption (I THINK) process.

Also I got to speak to someone last week and she says I do not know where this relationship is headed I do not think he shares the same ideas about the future with me and I do not think he will support my dreams. And I said Oh nooooooo dear! Why are you thinking, where is your partner c'mon go and speak with him. He/She can obviously answer questions but try as possible not to turn a communication into a nagging forum or a battlefield. Speak to your partner, a time comes when you believe okay I should talk to my partner about where we are headed, sit and discuss, give room for him/her to speak and for you to listen, do not argue rather communicate. Share thoughts, share ideas, map out plans together.

Most relationships go apart because of communication which I must tell is not a good reason. Do not ever make decisions based on assumptions, communicate with your partner and if it gets to a point where you know you both are thinking entirely different apply wisdom and make the best of your lives.

Communication is a basic factor that keeps distant relationships and without it, its difficult to carry on . Lets learn to communicate and express ourselves to our partners and also this applies in our daily life. When a Communication is timely, accurate then its problem-solving. Its never too late, do not live by assumptions, operate with the power of communication.
Here are some important steps to apply during a conversation, I think they will help just in a case you do not know how to go about a conversation with your partner.
-Learn to say what you mean: 

When you make your case, provide concrete examples of what you mean so your words make more sense. Don't just say, "I feel like you haven't done your share around the house..." Instead, say, "I've had to do the dishes every night for the last two weeks..."

Speak slowly enough for your partner to understand you. Don't just blurt out all of your angry feelings or he or she won't be able to follow your logic.

Remember that there's no prize for speaking for as long as you can. Hit all of the key points you want to hit, but don't just keep talking and talking until your partner is overwhelmed. 

-Use "I" or "me" statements: Don't start an argument off by accusing your partner of making a mistake. If you say, "You always..." or "You never..." then your partner's guard will be up and he'll be less likely to listen to your perspective. Instead, say something like, "I've noticed that..." or "Lately, I've been feeling like..." Making the discussion centered around your feelings will make your partner feel less like he's being castigated and more like he's part of a productive discussion.

-Keep as calm as you can: Though you may not be able to be as cool as a cucumber when you and your partner are in the middle of a heated discussion, the calmer you are, the more easily you will be able to express your feelings. So, if you're feeling furious in the middle of a conversation, or even livid before you bring up the issue, take a breather until you feel calm enough to start a productive discussion.
 COMMUNICATION IS LIKE OXYGEN TO A RELATIONSHIP, WITHOUT IT, IT DIES.

Feel free to share your ideas and drop your comments, I guess there are things you know that I do not know and I am willing to learn. For personal issues kindly send a mail to chukwuuju@ymail.com.

LOVE 101: PART 2D: LAUGHING IT OFF

Laughing is a medicine that heals the body and soul, it does same to relationships.

There are times we do not have to take everything our partner does or says as a serious one and automatically make it lead to a misunderstanding. We should learn to apply the SENSE OF HUMOR THEORY. We should not always frown at everything.

There are stories we just feel like telling our partners so as to make them laugh but then it turns out the wrong way. Am sure that has happened to most of us and if you are on the side of getting angry about every story your partner tells then this is for you. Have you ever wondered what if actually this story my partner is telling me can just be that which is needed to spark the mood. Lets read about Patricia and Philip.

Philip was to see Patricia that evening by 7pm and on her way, Patricia having dressed up, stepping out of her house she met this guy who stalks her everyday and this night he tells her how lovely she looks and how he would love to take her out. But then obviously Patricia who was in desperate look out for a cab obviously ignored all he said and quickly flagged the closest taxi and sped off to meet Philip, on getting there about 7:45pm, later than the actual time, after apologizing and stating how difficult it was for her to get a cab. Philip welcomed her with warmth and then they began to eat and drink.

At first Patricia wondered what would happen if I told Philip about the event of the night I just  hope he doesn't think I lied to him about coming late and then she finally opened up, told Philip the story how this particular guy had been disturbing her around her neighborhood and that evening on her way out he walked up to her again stating how beautiful she was and how he wanted to take her out. But to her surprise thinking Philip will say so is that why you came late because you were listening to some guy, or how sure am I that you have not been doing things behind me.

He goes, oh my love, I totally understand what that guy is going through, who on earth can keep his eyes off a beauty like you, am so blessed to have you and then they teased each other laughed about it and had a lovely evening.

The question is How Many of Us can do that?

Never let unnecessary things in a relationship become necessary. In a relationship the important factors are God, the ability to think and Understanding. Learn to understand when your partner says something for the fun of it and let it go. Sometimes some issues are worth laughing off.

Start today and Laugh that issue off.

This is the little I know and will appreciate your comments and if you have a story you would love me to give a solution to, kindly share via my mail chukwuuju@ymail.com.

LOVE 101: PART 2C: TAKING THE BLAME

Hmmm, Wow , *Smile*. I must admit it was difficult putting this together.
Just when I was about to start writing, a friend said, instead of using the Topic "Taking the blame" why not use "Be JESUS" because he is the only one who took totally all of our blame on his shoulders. If you share same mindset then this is for you.

But then I ask can you be the Savior to the person next to you? can you be the Savior of your relationship, can you take the blame and just say okay lets keep all of this issue aside, I take the blame and am sorry. What automatically do you feel will happen? We should try it...*smiles*

For me I believe if am not the one at fault and I take the blame, it just automatically makes the next person feel belittled, his/her actions might speak pride but then trust me the conscience will never be at peace. For the sake of peace you did take take the blame and then you can only say thank you Lord for making me act like you. Let me spice this with a true life story.

Sarah Zadok shares her story, Yesterday morning was a prime example and my husband was on the receiving end... Poor guy. I had to be at a doctor's appointment at 8:30, but we pressed "snooze" on the alarm clock one too many times and all got up late. We rushed around trying to get kids fed, adults caffeinated, lunches made, hair done, teeth brushed, sandals found and backpacks packed… The usual morning madness, just way short on time.
By the time we got everyone strapped in their car seats and delivered to their classrooms, we were pushing 8:20 and I still had to drop off my husband and get to my appointment. By the time the last kid was dropped off, the stress of the morning reached its crescendo, and I proceeded to lay down my royal flush of emotional cards in my epic battle to win the "blame game" with my husband.

"Why didn't you set the alarm to go off earlier?..You know I hate being late…Why is it always my job to pack the lunches?...You should be way more supportive!" By the time I screeched up to his office building, my poor husband had been exposed to enough verbal toxins to destroy a whole layer of ozone. But I sped away in a tizzy, feeling completely justified in my attack.
It wasn't until after my appointment (which I made with time to spare) that I started to feel like perhaps I had overdone it in the "my-husband-is-to-blame-for-everything" department. I started to feel really badly for behaving so childish and awful. So, I called his office and left an urgent message with his secretary. I told her to tell him "Ain hadevar talui ela bi (The matter rests entirely with me, the responsibility is all mine)." I knew he would understand what I meant. We had learned that lesson together through the following story...Story from the Blame Game.
Imagine how she felt when her husband did not say a word, he took the blame.
We should learn to take the blame most time and not always blame our partner for every crime. Christ took all of our blames we should reciprocate same.

PRACTICAL: Try this, take the blame for that issue, say am sorry. Even if you know you are right.
Send the result to me via my email address chukwuuju@ymail.com

This is the little I know, the floor is open for you to say what you think....