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Communication, it is often said that with communication as individuals especially in a relationship we are just two normal people. The power of communication saves us the stress of having to assume. At the commencement of a relationship in most cases the guy says will you be my girlfriend, I do not know if it still happens that way or if this is old school, but in the absence of that question we have two young people who are just in their world assuming, 'I THINK WE ARE IN A RELATIONSHIP'. But then the power of having to ask and communicate the status of friendship saves you from the assumption (I THINK) process.
Also I got to speak to someone last week and she says I do not know where this relationship is headed I do not think he shares the same ideas about the future with me and I do not think he will support my dreams. And I said Oh nooooooo dear! Why are you thinking, where is your partner c'mon go and speak with him. He/She can obviously answer questions but try as possible not to turn a communication into a nagging forum or a battlefield. Speak to your partner, a time comes when you believe okay I should talk to my partner about where we are headed, sit and discuss, give room for him/her to speak and for you to listen, do not argue rather communicate. Share thoughts, share ideas, map out plans together.
Most relationships go apart because of communication which I must tell is not a good reason. Do not ever make decisions based on assumptions, communicate with your partner and if it gets to a point where you know you both are thinking entirely different apply wisdom and make the best of your lives.
Communication is a basic factor that keeps distant relationships and without it, its difficult to carry on . Lets learn to communicate and express ourselves to our partners and also this applies in our daily life. When a Communication is timely, accurate then its problem-solving. Its never too late, do not live by assumptions, operate with the power of communication.
Here are some important steps to apply during a conversation, I think they will help just in a case you do not know how to go about a conversation with your partner.
-Learn to say what you mean:
When you make your case, provide concrete examples of what you mean so your words make more sense. Don't just say, "I feel like you haven't done your share around the house..." Instead, say, "I've had to do the dishes every night for the last two weeks..."
Speak slowly enough for your partner to understand you. Don't just blurt out all of your angry feelings or he or she won't be able to follow your logic.
Remember that there's no prize for speaking for as long as you can. Hit all of the key points you want to hit, but don't just keep talking and talking until your partner is overwhelmed.
-Use "I" or "me" statements: Don't start an argument off by accusing your partner of making a mistake. If you say, "You always..." or "You never..." then your partner's guard will be up and he'll be less likely to listen to your perspective. Instead, say something like, "I've noticed that..." or "Lately, I've been feeling like..." Making the discussion centered around your feelings will make your partner feel less like he's being castigated and more like he's part of a productive discussion.
-Keep as calm as you can: Though you may not be able to be as cool as a cucumber when you and your partner are in the middle of a heated discussion, the calmer you are, the more easily you will be able to express your feelings. So, if you're feeling furious in the middle of a conversation, or even livid before you bring up the issue, take a breather until you feel calm enough to start a productive discussion.
COMMUNICATION IS LIKE OXYGEN TO A RELATIONSHIP, WITHOUT IT, IT DIES.
Feel free to share your ideas and drop your comments, I guess there are things you know that I do not know and I am willing to learn. For personal issues kindly send a mail to chukwuuju@ymail.com.
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