So yeah, here's to the weekend and to the week that just passed, we are grateful for the awesomeness, even though things didn't go as expected, step out with all joy and stay grateful and hope you made people feel loved..who do you love?
So so so today we will be chit-chatting about forgiveness. Wondering where this topic came from? Before you ask I will tell you.
I got home on thursday night (yesterday) and I joined my sister to watch DAYSTAR channel and yeah my favourite lady and mentor Joyce Meyer was teaching on forgiveness and as usual, it was an amazing sermon, (you should try watching ENJOYING EVERYDAY LIFE with Joyce Meyer by 8am and 8pm Mon.-Fri.). That's a little advert. *winks* And when she was done Marcus Lamb came up and spoke about forgiveness too and I started wondering why these sermons about forgiveness today? Could it be for me? But since I didn't feel I had anyone in heart, *still thinking though*, then I thought I could actually talk about forgiveness with my next family ( you, my amazing reader)
What is forgiveness?
Forgiveness is the intentional and voluntary process by which a victim undergoes a change in feelings and attitude regarding an offense, lets go of negative emotions such as vengefulness, with an increased ability to wish the offender well.
I love this definition It simply says to forgive is an intentional act. You have to make the decision to let go of that offense and in turn wish the offender well.
It did not just say let go of the offense, it also goes further to say YOU WISH THE OFFENDER WELL.
The ability to let go of an offense is a step to tiding up the heart and giving room for more love and kindness to step in.
I actually was a victim of when I am offended by someone I do not take anything from that person or eat from that person.
I can recall a day I was out with my sister and she got me food, after getting me that food, she said a word to me that I did not like and so in turn I told myself I was not going to eat the food she got me to prove a point. lol. She apologised and apologised, but then I found it so hard to forgive, guess because I wanted to prove a point, of which I didn't just prove a point, I became an offender as well by offending my stomach in the long run as I did not eat and I went to bed soooo hungry. But then she ate and I'm sure she went to bed with a satisfied stomach. So what point exactly did I prove?
Here's to couples, your partner offends you and you decide you won't talk to him/her that night and you won't let them touch you, so you sleep towards the end of the bed almost falling off, why your partner is there having a nice time on the bed, imagine if the room is now cold, you coil up on the bed in anger and your partner says, I am sorry dear, but in anger you won't even reply because you are trying to prove a point. (My fellow ladies we are always guilty of this), covers him/herself and says goodnight. So what point are you trying to prove? Cold will almost finish you and you and the floor are dragging for space.
Why not just let it go.
I always say,
If you are going to forgive tomorrow, why not make it now....
Why make forgiveness a thing of procrastination.
Speak about it, tell him/her you offended me and then let it go. Is it that easy, you will ask, YES it is, the other things we do are the things I call trying to prove a point or the drama involved so that Oga/madam will pet you.
We all feel we are trying to prove a point when we get angry and stay away from the offender but then, do you know you cause more harm to yourself than the offense that was committed?
I learnt one trick. If someone offends me, I intentionally show an act of kindness to the offender. Then it keeps the offender wandering. I will obviously tell you how you offended me, but then that will not stop me from showing an act of kindness to you if necessary and asking for something if I need it (still learning though).
You would not want to be like me that had to starve myself all in the name of trying to prove a point, or the couple who almost falls off the bed just to prove a point or freezes in the bedroom just to prove a point.
If you must prove a point, prove it by showing an act of kindness to the offender and freeing yourself.
Unforgiveness is a chain and you decide when to break out, those chains of unforgiveness ain't for you.
Make an intentional effort to let go of that offense and every negative thought and above all WISH THE OFFENDER WELL.
Is it difficult? Oh yeah I know it might be.. But is it possible? YES.
So its up to you, are you ready to free your heart of that person's wrong? Are you ready to show an act of kindness to that offender? To the married people, will you now tell yourself, it's not worth falling off the bed? It's not worth freezing in the cold room?
Will love to see your responses below.
And yeah I need a feedback on how you went through the week making people feel loved and how it turned out. If you haven't done yours read it here and today is not too late...
Have an amazing weekend. I love you all.
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